How come reading tea leaves is seen as this sophisticated, witchy thing but if I slam dunk an open can of Chef Boyardee ravioli onto the pavement in the gas station parking lot to see what kind of soda the old ones think I should buy, foodstuff divination suddenly isn’t cool anymore?
‘Tis the fuckin’ season, friends!! Get out there and live your worst life!!
What the fuck is happening
Why don’t you grab a can of ravioli and ask!
how about I just whip a can of Mountain Dew as high into the air as I can and read the splash patterns when it busts open on the road?
I have until a car drives over it and makes tire tracks in the dew to get a good reading, and somehow the busy streets seem to be more accurate at this form of divination.
This is what I’m talking about!