hoarous:

theactualcluegirl:

taraljc:

jackironsides:

hellenhighwater:

butterynutjob:

melodramaticsoprano:

slytherpuff666:

illegitimate-businessman:

melodramaticsoprano:

So I got called into jury duty…

And I was put in the seat instantly, of course. I said, “your honor, I can’t be a juror on a two week trial, I have opera rehearsal.” And she said, “opera huh, well, sing something for us.”

And I did. In a federal court of law, in front of the judge, 75 jurors, the lawyers and the fucking DEFENDANT, I sang o mio babbino caro.

And the judge excused me.

@districtswiftie13

YO I DIDNT EMBARRASS MYSELF IN FEDERAL COURT SO YALL CAN DOUBT ME.

I know a lot of opera singers, and singing a full-on aria in a court room with only a hint of provocation is EXACTLY what they would do.

I know a lot of judges, and demanding an impromptu opera solo on a whim is also something they would do.

(And also one of the main reasons you can be excused from jury duty is economic hardship–basically, it would cause you unreasonable financial damage. If you’re a professional singer, a two week gap in your rehearsal schedule could do that for sure.)

As a muso, I absolutely believe this. I’ve got my accordion out of my carry-on and played a tune when airport security couldn’t recognise its weird mass of levers. Singers and musicians are just Like That.

Accurate.

My friend got stopped at the Canadian border coming back into the US. Border patrol took one look at his tattoed, ear-gagued, mutton chop wearing, hipster self, and said “I don’t believe you’re an opera singer. Sing something for me.”

His wife immediately put down her knitting and plugged her ears, because Matt’s a contrabasso, and he does NOT sing quietly.

Every other booth along the border stop had a head poking out of it within twenty seconds. And they let them pass without further contest.

One time I had a cole slaw craving at like 10pm so i went to KFC and the girl at the counter was like IT’S CHRISTMAS, SING ME A CAROL AND I’LL GIVE YOU YOUR SLAW, and I was like, oh, I uh—but then her coworker was like GDI STOP DOING THIS. YOU DONT HAVE TO SING. SHES BEEN DOING THIS ALL DAY

so of course I busted out the first few bars of Amarilli (which isn’t actually a christmas carol, but it was what i’d been practicing at the time so shhh), and let me tell you, nearly-empty fast food restaurants have GREAT acoustics

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