drferox:

I just had my youtube viewing rudely interrupted by an advertisement for Clive Palmer’s ‘Palmer United’ stab at politics, and Oh My DOG is this a sad state of affairs. I am almost at a loss for words. Almost.

• The man has all the eloquence and charisma of a bowl of cold porridge, which if you don’t know has all the texture of half-dried snot. I have not seen anyone this fundamentally uninspiring and banal in politics in my entire life.
• His video looks like a hostage video, for his own party. Does the man have any conviction at all? A nervous 12 year old doing a school presentation would do better, flash cards and all.
• Straight up “We should build more coal power plants so you have a cheaper energy bill” shortly followed by “I own a massive coal company, by the way”. I mean is the entire premise of this party is that they want stupid people to vote for them?
• Maybe, since there’s a bright yellow billboard near my sign with this mug’s face on it that says “Make Australia Great Again!”
• In an electorate that’s 60% immigrants, by the way.
• I know our country is currently being led by someone that looks like the equivalent of a damp wash cloth but come on.
• How is this man still running when he caused so much direct joblessness in his electorate?
• Can we just have a party with the slogan of “Make Australia Not America” for once?!